I have the time and will to write for the first time in a long while and I've cut my finger badly tonight. Ironic. My children have flown the coop to see their dad suddenly, and I have the evening alone. I have thanksgiving fixings to tend, but it's a rare thing not to have a young person about to tend these days.
It's been a challenging day having gotten a call from the high school that one of my sons is suspended from school...third time in a year and half...for skipping class and breaking a mirror in the rest room. I don't even know what to say except, "His dad will be at the disciplinary hearing next week." My hands are utterly tied and my spirit hurts for my son. Without proper support I've nowhere to mend with him.
A friend at work asked me about divorce and children. I told him it was the worst possible thing to do to them. No doubt about it. I also explained in my case that I would have to have given up personhood to stay married. He looked at me with a question mark clearly between his eyes, but it's all I could or would muster. My children suffer deeply. In the last year, I nearly lost everything with another of my sons, Thanks to an incredible family's support and loving care, the same young man smiles and enjoys life everyday now, whereas last year he spent the year in such a dark place. I'm so very grateful to spend thanksgiving in brighter space with him.
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