I don't want to say too much so as to honor my son, but I wanted to record a conversation between us today. I mentioned this is our summer to wrestle his adoption issues to the ground with him. I am quite literally studying and administering intensive therapy methods concerning bonding, and the raging tiger trapped within my beloved son has sprung from its' steel cage onto my weary back. He and I are spending huge chunks of our day in "time in". It's quite the opposite of "time out". When he's not peaceful, his consequence is to spend time with a pleasant and centered me. Staying pleasant and centered in a thunder storm of emotion brings me to my knees, again quite literally.
Today he started explaining to me that he has come to understand what all this "time in" means.
"Mom, it's like the main character in Eragon, in the book Eragon, who must stay on a stump until he learns all there is to life, because this is the method of his teacher. Eragon's kind of like me, learning by observing all the things around him. His teacher watches to evaluate Eragon's potential. You're watching to see my potential."
Ah. My little grasshopper. You are onto something big.
Reflection- not punishment. Space to be and feel deeply. Modeling respect. Hope. Healing.
2 comments:
wow.. .you are doing a great job.
kristen,
thank you. his work is much harder than mine.
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